I am not alone... Pregnancy Loss Awareness Day

My family and friends think I am crazy with all of the different apps and blogs I follow related to fertility and trying to conceive.  A different emotion/feeling comes up everyday when I check one of my favorite apps, "period tracker".  Dusty loves to joke with me and call it "periodpanties.com". I have no clue why, but just typing this makes me smile.  I love how he accepts my craziness :)

Some days I see success stories and I am jealous, some days I see new members going through grief and my heart aches for them.  Today..... I see so many strong women coming together to recognize their loss and share their story.  It is a day not only to continue healing (note that I said continue as I don't think the pain will ever go away), but also join together and DO something about our loss.  Many women are releasing balloons or lighting candles at 7 pm today.  Dusty is out of town today so I am not quite sure what my plan is.  

As I read other's stories online, I can't help but relate to so much that I read. Just to copy some of the words:

"I didn't have a miscarriage, I had an ectopic pregnancy and nearly died"

"I think the main difference for me boils down to the extent of the physical trauma.  Not only do ectopic pregnancy sufferers have to deal with the loss of a tube, sometimes a part or all of their uterus, an overy, their blood and ultimately their life.  The damage can severely effect their future fertility (this decreases at least 30%... minimum) and that is if they intend to ever risk putting their bodies through this again because they will now have a 20% chance of it happening again."

Today like any other day, I try to think of what I have gained from this, other than the weight and scars.  I have gained awareness for something many people are not aware of or at least do not speak about.